Friday, November 13, 2009

Quote Of The Day 11/13/09

“My doctor tells me I should start slowing it down -- but there are more old drunks than there are old doctors so let's all have another round.”

-Willie Nelson


After being inapprioately frisked, I was able to visit my Uncle Orso in the pen. Yea, I know, we don't exactly look alike, but uncles in Italian families take on various roles.

Uncle Orso: Tank! It’s been months, come over here and see your old uncle. Just cleaning off a little bit.

"The Tank": How's it been?

Uncle Orso: Not too bad, at dinnertime, all us old guys get together. Mr. Kangaroo chops the garlic, Possum Sam cooks the sausage, and I of course, make the sauce. Seems the guards have a soft spot for an eternal supply of Charlee Bears.

"The Tank": Wow! Just like in Good Fe-

Uncle Orso: Now flop your ears out, and listen up. The truck is delivering the goods soon-I mean delivering the charitable donations very soon, you will know when and where the truck is going to be when the time is here, trust me.

"The Tank": Last time you asked someone to trust you, a kangaroo and possum ended up in here!

Uncle Orso: For the family Tank, you always forget that very important fact, its all for the "Family Business". Go on now, my masseuse, Tina, will be here in thirty.

"The Tank": Fine, wait a minute did you say Ti-

Uncle Orso: Guard!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Quote Of The Day 11/10/09

“I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.”

-Rita Rudner

New Orders

Big M informed me that it has been much too long since I have paid my dear uncle a visit, and it seems that he may have a tip on a very lucrative truck, that just might be passing through my way. A truck full of charitable gifts of course.

"Go ahead and see your dear uncle, all that...that thing did for you, all those years. Listen to him carefully. Mr. Shadowcaster won't take kindly to another mix up. Hand me my eye cream and get out, the gals are comming over for gin and bingo."

So in the cold, wet rain, I leave to visit my uncle. I must say, I've never much liked his living arrangements.

Benny "The Tank"

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Quote Of The Day 11/08/09

"Americans love to fight. All real Americans love the sting of battle."

-George S. Patton

Free Range

Reunited with our shadows we all enjoyed the beautiful day. As we basked in the warm sunlight, my shadow exclaimed how thankful he was to be free, and attached to his body once again. In fact, all the shadows proclaimed their freedom in the warm light, never wanting to loose it again, but I fear there are some shadows out there that will never realize how free they truly are. Guess some shadows have to be educated the hard way. However, there is one thing we must do to make the day perfect...Run! Run free, until our hearts tell us to stop. Luckily, once again the low quality doggie cam caught it all!

Benny "The Tank" and his Shadow